All Anthony Bawn needs now is a shot. He already has the product. He certainly has the experience and the talent. But he needs to get through the door, a chance to show his work to the world. As a Black LGBTQ creator, he finds that there are not enough stories about his culture and his experience. That is: there is not enough content in mainstream media that showcase queer people of color driving the story. So, he is intent on producing these much-needed narratives. As a multitalented showrunner, creator, producer, director, and actor, Bawn has given us films such as As I Am (2020) and Velvet Jesus (2021), and the TV series Trace (2021) and Conframa (2019-2021). He would like for more people to be able to watch his work. We spoke with Anthony Bawn about the original idea for Conframa and his wish to make it in the mainstream.

 

You are the creator of the show called Conframa, about a married gay couple involved in a love triangle. Where did the ideas for the title and show come from?

This is based off true to life events that I have personal knowledge of. These situations came with a lot of drama and turmoil. I decided to write about it. I told my mentor what was going on at the time and he described these situations as ‘conframa.’ He explained that it is an 80s term for confusion and drama. I knew right there that I had the title for a show about a love triangle.

 

It is a show that is both dramatic and fun. What can you tell us about the comedic side of it?

First of all, it was hilarious to shoot the show. But, if you look at it, many of the situations are very serious. It is a serious issue that this husband and husband open up their marriage to another person to intervene, so it could deter one person from the other person. It is how one navigates through those emotions that makes it funny. When you are doing something that does not feel comfortable, it is an awkward feeling. The comedy is created out of the awkwardness.

 

There are serious issues raised, such as sexual and physical abuse. Why was it important for you to add this element to the show?

Although I’ve never experienced this, I definitely wanted to bring these issues of domestic violence up. It does happen in triangle relationships. Why does someone stay in an abusive relationship? I wanted to show that, sometimes, people are pigeonholed. They think that this is all they deserve. I wanted to bring that to the forefront. You have a character like Chase, who enters the relationship with my character, Angel, and his husband Bretton. Chase is used to turmoil and going from house to house looking for love. He just happens to find love in the wrong situation. Now that he has feelings for Angel and Bretton, Chase feels like there is a little bit of light at the end of the tunnel. That is abruptly stopped by his abusive partner, Derek, who is determined to not allow Chase to leave.

 

Today there is such a fine line in terms of what you can say and what you can do without people getting offended. Your material is very candid. How do you find a good balance?

I say: ‘Fuck it.’ There are so many fine lines that everyone wants to walk on. This means that no one is speaking the truth. So, if you are walking on thin ice while you are trying to find the truth and you are afraid to fall through the thin ice, then I would rather fall through the ice and swim through the water. I would rather tell my truth. I tell my writers to be as candid as possible. At the end of the day, you cannot tell me how my experience is. If I experience things in a certain way, that is my experience. If you don’t agree with it, it at least sparks a conversation.

 

For whom did you write the show?

I wrote the show for myself. I did it as a therapeutic thing for myself, because of the drama that my husband and I went through. I wanted to be able to see it on paper and see where I went wrong and how I could fix it.

 

Is it important for Black gay men that a show like Conframa exists?

It is a pleasure for me to create something that will entertain Black gay men and inform them. If you have been in a relationship like I have for 15 years, how to spice up things and make the sex life juicier is a common topic. Conframa gives an inside glimpse of what a triangle relationship is like in many different forms. It is good to be able to see that.

 

How important is it for Black gay men to see themselves represented in stories like the one you tell in Conframa?

It is very important. If we cannot identify and understand who we are as men and as Black gay men and see that represented in a positive light on television, then you will have a whole new generation who are still going to be on the down-low – that is, question their sexuality. Whereas, if you can have something that you can reference and identify with, then that can help someone in the backwoods. It can help them stand firm in their identity.

 

Do you think there is a lack of material like this?

There are so many independent creators developing captivating stories of Black gay men that mainstream media ignores. I see this a lot. I am one of them trying to create these stories. You do see more and more mainstream shows that are attempting to be inclusive by putting an LGBTQ storyline in there. Still, there are not enough shows in mainstream media that showcase queer people of color, where it is our narrative that is driving the story.

 

Why do you think that is?

Because of the politics behind the business of entertainment. It is a bunch of white men who are driven by numbers. They are not artistically driven. They are not thinking of the long-term impact. Pose, for instance, should have had a longer run. That is a whole section of a group of transgender individuals that still have many stories to be told. I would like to see more stories with Queer POC. Shows that are for us and created by us.

 

What would your message be to major companies like Netflix, Amazon, Apple, all the others?

If I were able to get in those doors, I would say to them: “Allow me to influence another generation, please. Just let me do that because it will not just be myself. I would go to all the other LGBTQ Black creators and say: ‘We have this one shot.’ Let’s take this one shot and make it happen.” That is all you really need, one shot. It’s going to trickle down to so many other things. At the end of the day, the difference between content creator and the studio is the marketing budget. There are so many ways of creating material. The marketing budget is the difference.

 

What is the main obstacle for you to get your material out there?

Marketing budget. I have the access to the outlets of Amazon or iTunes or channels of that nature, but I do not have the budget to make people aware of my content. It will just sit there.

 

You wear many hats on Conframa. You are the creator, writer and you play the lead character, Angel. How challenging and difficult has the process been?

It has been extremely difficult. When you are an independent content creator, the big issue is that everything is self-funded. The most difficult thing is having people on board to create a project and to have the talent be fully committed. The pay is not that great. Everyone looks to me for everything. I have people to help me, but I don’t have the financial means to have a whole team around me. Everything comes out of my own pocket. So, I am also the one trying to get my money back on the backend once it gets distributed.

 

Your characters use the n-word. It is used in communication between Black people. What do you think of the use of this word?

How can I say this? Culturally, it is a term that we have reversed. Instead of it having a negative connotation, we reversed it to be something kind of endearing and an acknowledgment of something. On the flip side, when it is used by a different culture, it is not the same thing. To my generation, it is like a throwaway word. For someone who is not knowledgeable of our cultural setting, I can see how it can be a trigger word. It is a very iffy thing. I understand the confusion. It is difficult to explain to others how it feels to live in our skin. It is difficult to articulate that feeling. A lot of times, when that word comes up, it is hard for us to explain it. Culturally, it is okay for us because you gave us the word. We are going to take the word. We reclaimed it. We have the ownership. It is our word.

 

How do you celebrate Black History Month?

Because of the climate that this country has been in the last few years, with the previous administration and the racial rhetoric that this country has allowed, is just disgusting to me. For me, Black History Month is just another month. It is another month for people to sell ads. That is how I feel about it. We appreciate our forefathers who created this month of celebration but, if they were to see what is going on now in our country, they would be livid.